free

there was a moment

when i decided to save myself.

when i thought: enough.

enough pity

enough fear

enough excuses

when i realized that being kind to myself

did not mean

following impulses

basing decisions off convenience

and there is no love without challenge

no reward without bravery

and as i suddenly decided to attack everything that scared me

my terror evaporated and melted into the dewy sponge of my past

and my phantom fear was just a stain in my memories

and I’m soaring.